from
All That Has Come Apart/Once Did Not Exist,
released December 15, 2020
Snorted too many orange lines
In a diner with my step mom
Car keys in slow motion
Ran a stop sign but we ended up fine
She was laughing I thought
Nothing of it then
Neglecting your cigarette
Nodding out while the tv hums
Tried to switch it off
Jolt awake and you say,
“Hey I was watching that”
Takes all my strength not
To scream and smash the screen
And burn this fucking house down
Before you do
Came home from the 8th grade
The house in total disarray
Garbage in the pantry
Food rotting in the laundry
Mom pacing around
With no clothes on said
Dad poisoned the Kool aid
So you’re nailing all the windows
Shut
Keeping memories like clutter
Old receipts like lovers
Bowing to a stone statue crumbling
The capacity is full
But always looking for the other
A new disease to mutter
Out of breath but you can stutter
Remember after easter
After marks accident
Ran over by a car
Removing his intestines
You gave me a bag to give to him
Xanax chocolate and Percocet
We were only children I thought
Nothing of it then
Cutting back on drinking
At night I stopped dreaming
Sick inclinations don’t wanna start shaking
Puking at the bus stop
Sleep until the sun drop
Trembling and shitting blood
Cry enough to make a little flood
Keeping memories like clutter
Old receipts like lovers
Bowing to a stone statue crumbling
The capacity is full
But always looking for the other
A new disease to mutter
Out of breath but you can stutter
In Pursuit of your bliss
On a bus that smells like piss
Driving through the dead night
Running all the stop lights
Occupied with the cast
Of your life future and past
There is no destination
Fates a hallucination
